Change is inevitable in life. People will grow as they gain new experiences, go through losses, and attain new insights.
OPENNESS in a relationship means that you can continue to share your innermost hopes, dreams, discoveries, and desires with your partner.
Why is OPENNESS important?
Changes can be positive or negative, simple or life-changing, but OPENNESS in a relationship ensures that you and your partner continue to grow together through the changes, instead of apart.
Think back to the early stages of getting to know someone. How many of your conversations were open discussions about you and your partner’s hopes, dreams, and desires for the future.
Now when is the last time you had that kind of conversation? Was it with your partner? In this exercise, let’s kick start the conversation!
Step 1) Approach your partner with curiosity. Ask them to share with you about a hope, dream, or desire they may have that you don’t know about.
Step 2) Listen to them and reflect what you are hearing.
Step 3) Share a dream of your own
Lisa and Mark have been married for quite a while and think they know each other fairly well.
However, in the spirit of this exercise, Lisa might say: “Mark, when you and I first started dating we had long talks about what we hoped to accomplish in the future. What is a dream you have these days for the future? I know we’ve talked about the basics, but is there something I don’t know about?”
Mark may respond with: “Well Lisa, it’s funny you ask that because there is something that’s been on my mind for a while now. You know my dad passed last year and I always regretted not taking him up on his idea to visit his hometown in Scotland while he was able. I know we don’t have the budget for that right now, but it’s been weighing on my mind a bit, especially as the anniversary of his passing is coming up. What about you? ”
Lisa may say: “Mark, I didn’t know you felt that way. I’m sorry you didn’t get to do that with your dad. I know you miss him a lot. He was an interesting and caring man. He placed a lot of value on family and it sounds like you’re interested in discovering more about your roots. I’ve always been interested in my heritage as well. However, my dream recently has been to get an online store going. I’ve been doing my hobby for a while now but recently I’ve started thinking about making it a real business.”