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All Blog Posts (1,082)

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: Blood in the Water

**post contains bullying references**

Society seems to have moved towards a mental attitude where pulling apart those perceived as “imperfect people’ and taking a sick joy in hurting them until they can’t take anymore as acceptable behavior.


No it isn’t.

This isn’t acceptable. It’s just not.

On the job, or for me the many jobs, bullying was contained in an agenda I’d not been aware of before taking on the jobs. Bullying was not always… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 1, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

PTSD Blogger
SUNDAY Chat Topics!! Drop In & Visit!

Sunday brunch 9'til noon -- someone bring the Tim Tams or donuts! Coffee needed! 

3 o'clock Sunday -- companion animals, do you have one  or know someone who does? Does your pet fill that need for the calm? 

Sunday Supper at 6pm -- PTSD/TBI and family, how are your Sunday Suppers? Is your PTSD/TBI a 'guest' at your table?  

9pm to Midnight -- I can't sleep!! Sound familiar? Come on in and stay awhile!

Added by Bree N. on February 28, 2015 at 9:24am — 2 Comments

A camera doesn't lie, right? Oh yeah!

The suspect had a laundry list of beefs about his treatment at the hands of two city cops who tried to arrest him after outstanding warrants surfaced during a traffic stop in North Carolina.

In his federal civil rights lawsuit, for which he served as his own…


Added by Officer Derek Tomlinson on February 28, 2015 at 1:25am — 2 Comments

PTSD Blogger
TBI: OMG I'm Stuck in Toddler Time!

Earlier in the week my daughter and I were in the kitchen. I asked “what time is it?” as I washed dishes. She replied she thought it was 3pm. Okay, I have plenty of time to make dinner later at 6pm. We chatted some more just enjoying our conversation and she left the kitchen. She came flying back into the kitchen and cried out, “Mama! I am so sorry it’s 6pm not 3. I don’t know why I thought it was 3.” She blushed in embarrassment.

Shocking her I burst out laughing as I realized I was… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 27, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

First Responders Disappearing

FOX13 News has told you about Memphis Police officers turning in their badges and their guns and looking for new jobs.

Frustration with city benefit cuts are leading to an exodus of officers.

FOX13 News has learned it's happening in the city's fire department too.

We've heard the complaints for months and letters obtained by FOX13 News confirm it. Bluff City firefighters and paramedics are leaving the city to take new jobs.

“It's like anything…


Added by Capt. D Lewis on February 26, 2015 at 8:00pm — 2 Comments

PTSD Blogger
TBI: What if I Can Change My "Groundhog Days"?

I had an astounding thought upon waking up Monday morning. “What if today was a planned different day? Can I change my groundhog days? Now I know my days are different, they just seem the same to me. There is still a struggle each day to realize today is (fill in the blank) day and tomorrow is (fill in the blank) day. Every single day I struggle with this. It’s the ongoing sense of being stuck in the ‘groundhog day’. But what if I chose to change this?

Sit down and make some lists.… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 25, 2015 at 6:00am — 1 Comment

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: Tournament Day

After a very long day on Friday with my son’s doctor appointment and etceteras we had a martial arts tournament to attend on Saturday. Martial Arts have been a part of our family’s life for ten years now. My son is an instructor now had a student we wanted to be supportive of while he competed on Saturday. I had no idea they’d changed the competition schedules which made us be there for nine and a half hours.

This was a strain big time on my PTSD issues as people crowded against each… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 22, 2015 at 6:00am — 1 Comment

PTSD Blogger
TBI: I Just Want To Remember Yesterday

We got rescheduled for my son’s appointment with the Neurologist. My reactions to this - "Good, he’s being seen a good week earlier than expected". Then, wow is it ever making me agitated, nervous and scared of what he’s looking at.

This appointment is all about him, it is not about ME at all. Okay, I fess up that I have to repeat this statement to myself often in these moments of serious issues happening. I have to put my crud aside and try very very hard to focus on the task at… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 21, 2015 at 6:00am — 3 Comments

PTSD Blogger
No blog today...Saturday instead!

The site had a glitch when I tried to get on to post this morning. So I was unable to post, plus I wasn't prepared at all!

My son's appt was rescheduled to be this morning. He's going to have an MRI, plus they did additional bloodwork, and prescribed him some medication. There are some serious concerns regarding his hypoxia when he was admitted to the E.R. We're hanging in there. Together we WILL be fine.

Added by Bree N. on February 20, 2015 at 3:55pm — 1 Comment

PTSD Blogger
TBI: What i know now.

TBI. It deserves a respectful attitude. Each one is different with it’s own unique qualities and deficits. It is something recoverable, but also not recoverable for all most unfortunately. I worry on this one a lot. This is all I’ve got to deal with life with? This is it?

My horrible truth is I remember what it was like to look at something and remember it immediately. It was like having a camera inside my brain which took a snapshot of certain things, videos of others. I remember… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 18, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

Firefighter Exposure

Hello all from the WNY area and its is freezing cold here today (-5) and I have about 23" of snow in my backyard. I am one not to cry or complain about the snow but darnit needs to quit as I am out of room to put any more snow, I am glad I have good neighbors as I have piled it on their lawns and they the same.So I hope the rest of you are doing OK and I hear there is more snow on the way for the southern half of the country and we need to watch are driving skills so as not to cause a…


Added by Bob Allard on February 16, 2015 at 6:52pm — 1 Comment

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: Honoring the Experience

I've been challenged before and recently by the statement full of attitude; “well what is –YOUR- PTSD about anyway? Yours can’t possibly be as BAD as mine.” I’m never sure if this is more about the fact that I’m a woman, or more about the other person not having faced their own demons. I can’t stand in judgment on this one. Yet –I- feel very judged when it happens to me. One, it immediately triggers my issues, it also puts me in a position of feeling pressured to overshare about something… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 15, 2015 at 6:00am — 3 Comments

PTSD Blogger
TBI: Friday Agitation

Agitated. That is the inner part of me. Outwardly I just can’t move, don’t want to move. I want to cuddle with the dog after waking in the night. Where is she? My PTSD companion dog has realized my son needs her more than I do. No I need you, where are you? She’s sleeping in the living room after wandering in and out of his room, waiting outside his door since she isn’t allowed in there at night.

Sleep, I can’t sleep, I was sleeping, what happened? Gawd I’m so scared right now. What… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 13, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: No Judgement

***Post may trigger addiction issues***

Some days I have to say this out loud to myself to get it. "No judgement" I say it to myself as I remember that which I wish I could absolutely forget. 

In the most unmentionable of things I realize I can't move forward without being true to me, to my journey. I'm just a person. I'm just a woman who's looking at my own road of healing and realizing it's loaded with a lot of terribly unhealthy attempts to 'deal'. I… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 11, 2015 at 6:00am — 1 Comment

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: Overwhelmed & Wildly Irrational

On all levels I feel as if I am drowning. My quest for sleep, for balance has been overwhelmed by this past week's emergency with my son. Although he is doing better now there is still the ongoing wait until the specialist will see him. I had the car checked out and there is a load of frustration and anger associated with this. Being a woman, going to a repair shop to have previous work checked out is never a good thing. I long for the days I was in uniform and things got fixed and fixed right… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 8, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

PTSD Blogger
Friday, Am I Thankful?

Friday. Thank God it’s Friday. I see that attitude flung about each week and I remember how I never had a ‘Friday’ because I always worked the weekends. My weekend was the middle of the week for a lot of years. Yesterday was supposed to be a really special day for my daughter (25) and yet again I just failed. I showed up, I socialized and somehow totally put my foot in it after all my trying so hard.

In the end my daughter and I had words. Or perhaps it would be more truthful to say… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 6, 2015 at 6:00am — 2 Comments

PTSD Blogger
TBI: When Family Needs 911

“I don't feed well, coming home early.” I read this text and thought “autocorrect strikes again.”

My son (22) drives up into the driveway and the next thing I hear is the doorbell. “What is he ringing the bell for?” I open the door to find him leaning against the storm door and he lurches into the house shedding his coat, sunglasses, keys in several directions and throwing down his messenger bag full of expensive college books. Alarmed I ask him “what is wrong? Are you okay?” He… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 4, 2015 at 6:00am — 3 Comments

PTSD Blogger
PTSD: Water Water Everywhere...

**May contain triggers (brief mention of torture)**

Water, life's basic need. Yet I cannot drink it. Will not drink it. The taste of even bottled water sickens me. The faint scent of chlorine, the taste of anything especially any metallic taste, and I become nauseous. I'd gotten to a point of not drinking anything but coffee, tea, or diet soda to realize something was very wrong. 

Why can't I drink water?

My daughter complains about how we buy… Continue

Added by Bree N. on February 1, 2015 at 6:00am — 2 Comments

PTSD Blogger
Super Bowl Sunday

Super Bowl Sunday. It's a day most are planning for, excited about, fixing all kinds of foods, drinks and inviting friends over. Yet I've been decompensating for weeks now. I got through the Autumn, through the trigger happy holidays. Now what? I have seen so many mentions about Super Bowl Sunday that I finally got it.

Just over 2 weeks ago I found an old cell phone. Out of curiosity I charged it up, mainly to see if the whole "carry old cell phones in emergency kits to call 911'… Continue

Added by Bree N. on January 30, 2015 at 6:00am — 2 Comments

Thanks all

Thank you all for the birthday wishes I have been busy lately here with the new Firefighter 1 course that is being changed and I have also been baby sitting the grand-kids as the little one (aubree) was back in the hospital overnight as she has asma, long story, she is out and play and fighting with her brother.

But thanks and the weather here is cold, we missed the Big Storm that hit the East coast, sounds like it fizzled, but hey its winter and I am in WNY. Hope that the ones that…


Added by Bob Allard on January 28, 2015 at 10:07am — 1 Comment

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