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Featured Blog Posts – March 2015 Archive (14)

Colorado Guardian Angel Gala Fundraiser

The Colorado Guardian Angels are hosting a Gala fundraiser to recognize Police, Fire Fighters, military and other local Heroes in our community, we will have food, drinks, music, raffle prizes, and a silent auction. We will also have local celebrities joining us such as Biff Gore from the TV show "The Voice" will be performing for us, and much more. Tickets are now being sold. $25 a ticket June 27th 2015 5pm 10pm Don't miss this huge event.

Added by Ryan Warren on March 29, 2015 at 3:30pm — 2 Comments

PTSD + Medical Gaslighting = The STIGMA

Two weeks ago I had an appointment at which I experienced yet another bout of "medical gaslighting", This has shown me it is still alive and thriving well. It cause me to nearly relapse and to experience an anger so out of control I really didn't know what to do with it.

In an attempt to gain control of so many things out of control I did what so many women do. I colored my hair. Oh, it wasn't the 'touch up the roots' (which I needed) it was an extreme just go for it kind of decision…


Added by Bree N. on March 29, 2015 at 10:24am — 1 Comment

PTSD: Stop the Stigma, Stop The Excuses

**can be triggering for those with PTSD**

(this has been an infuriating week for me. This is from my personal blog ...)

Stigma, it's a hot button topic for me. I hate, absolutely hate how the word 'depression' is linked to PTSD. the D in PTSD does NOT stand for depression!! It does not go hand in hand.

PTSD has a lot of waves, or periods of growth, retreat and stagnation. In talking with someone I can often tell where they are stuck. Yes, it's very possible to… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 27, 2015 at 9:33am — 2 Comments

TBI: Faith Returned...Where Did It Go?

My Faith is a deep part of the person I was before the TBI and it's not going to fade away. My stubbornness refuses to let go of the peacefulness my Faith held for me day to day. The morning I woke up to realize my Faith was back was similar to recognizing a face I'd forgotten long ago. It is something I don't want to let go of again. Does this mean my Faith is a bigger part of me than I had realized or worse taken for granted?

I've always had a deep abiding Faith. Prayer held a… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 25, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

PTSD: Flirting With My Triggers

The most dangerous of flirting is flirting with my triggers for PTSD. It seems to be an act which is meaningless. Why go back there to the place of hurt? It borders on self-flagellation. I look back now and realize I wanted to keep hurting deep inside because I couldn’t let it out, couldn’t talk about it. I’d become a tightrope walker when it came to my personal triggers.

Need someone to help your PD students to test out on ‘pretend’ victims? I’m on it. I’ll sign those forms and… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 22, 2015 at 8:31am — No Comments

Fire Chiefs and Fire Marshals

If you would be so kind as to take a brief moment to follow the link below to take a very brief survey. This survey is part of my capstone research project for a Masters Degree in Public Administration I am completing. Any and all help is appreciated, Thank you!!

Added by Joe Szewczyk on March 20, 2015 at 9:34am — 2 Comments

PTSD: Flying Incognito on Twitter

I did everything right. I did all those things I was told to do. Used my real name, protected my tweets, kept my FaceBook account only for family, used a nickname for a dating site and never met anyone except in a public place. The entire time I had no clue I was being stalked online which eventually crossed over into my day to day world. In the end did I do anything wrong? No. I followed the rules of the online world somehow believing I would never be a target. 

I will probably… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 20, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

PTSD: Crawling in the Dark

PTSD: crawling in the dark

It’s dark, so dark. I feel the cold, damp underneath my knee pads as I crawl with a dimming light. “what can you see? What do you hear?” the voice next to me and off to the side asks. “I see cement slabs, gravel, dirt, leaves and I think I see an opening ahead about a person’s length ahead.” I stop and breathe, listen to my surroundings. I ask myself if I can hear anything besides the sound of my heart beating. What do I smell? What can I… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 15, 2015 at 6:00am — 1 Comment

Am I Protecting My Own Six?

The unanswerable questions are what haunt me in the night. Those questions pursue me until I wake up panting for air. Sweating and overheated I bolt awake. I swallow back yet another scream. In my nightmare I’d been screaming for what seemed like hours on end until I was hoarse. As I wake up my throat hurts again as if I was still in this place where no questions could ever be answered. I have no answers and I know I never will.

The unanswerable. Those are the worst. Those moments… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 13, 2015 at 6:00am — 1 Comment

TBI: As I look around, things are different

Things are not the same.I... I am not the same. I look around and realize my life has not only changed, but I have changed. This brain injury changed everything. My life had slid into the mudhole deep before I injured my brain. Kind of the whole “add insult to injury” feeling there. I’d seemingly been a dabbler. I wasn’t. I read back over my journals from that time and I read the frustration held inside those entries. The innate need to keep safe kept me holding everyone at not only arm’s… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 11, 2015 at 6:00am — 3 Comments

PTSD: The Art of Rambling

I’m a rambler, and I think I probably was before too but the agitation with my PTSD sometimes makes it worse. I ramble on and on in sessions which now I get clocked on when I do. The trust level after close to a year of consistent appointments is quite high so I don’t get offended. Rambling is also my way to ‘avoid’. It’s an avoidance tactic for me.

In uniform it was the ‘bubble head’ tactic which worked well for me so it’s probably a learned tactic. One to use when I don’t want to… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 8, 2015 at 11:08am — 2 Comments


Wins have become an important part of the process of healing for me on my path. If I don’t acknowledge there have been wins it just seems as if nothing is moving forward. I’m deeply grateful for being able to recognize them now. At first I thought it was just like bragging to myself. This didn’t feel okay, it felt selfish. Now I get it though. I see it for what it is. It’s growth happening. It might be small but it’s growth and that’s all that counts.

Facing up to something hard to… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 6, 2015 at 6:00am — 3 Comments

TBI: Confusion

Confusion. Some days it consumes me in the most annoying of moments. The confusion happens when I forget about important things. I’ve been sick for 5 weeks. I’d forgotten how long I’d been sick. I didn’t want to be sick and so I just kept forgetting. I’d been coughing for 4 weeks. My therapist pointed out that my cough had been going on for the last 2 appointments. So add another week in there? 5 weeks total. Too long. I had to make an actual commitment to getting in the urgent care clinic and… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 4, 2015 at 6:00am — 4 Comments

PTSD: Blood in the Water

**post contains bullying references**

Society seems to have moved towards a mental attitude where pulling apart those perceived as “imperfect people’ and taking a sick joy in hurting them until they can’t take anymore as acceptable behavior.


No it isn’t.

This isn’t acceptable. It’s just not.

On the job, or for me the many jobs, bullying was contained in an agenda I’d not been aware of before taking on the jobs. Bullying was not always… Continue

Added by Bree N. on March 1, 2015 at 6:00am — No Comments

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