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The elusive sleep, will i it never end?

Sleep. It's been an elusive quest for me 2005. First it was waking up and being unable to return to sleep. Then it changed,if i fell asleep there was hypervigilency of checking out every sound. Safety for my family first and foremost. I have no clue how I raised my 3 in college prep high schools, EMT classes and the many hours of clinicals. Then came the PD job in addition to EMT work, paramedic class with clinicals of ride alongs, ER, OR FD, downed building rescue training, a third part time job, working hard in the gym, running.

How I balanced all that? I do not have a clue.

And yet sleep still eluded me.Still eludes me in spite of the normal sleep meds prescribed by the PA.

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USFRA Staff
Comment by Capt. D Lewis on February 27, 2014 at 1:57am

Hello Bree. I shied away from sleeping meds too, ass I did not want to rely on them in order to sleep. I've taken to meditation and heavy workouts. Especially in my fire gear. It wears me slap out. But sometimes it doesn't work, like now, it's 0200 and I can't get my brain to shut off although my body is begging me to rest. I'll probably read some of the post on USFRA, write a post or two myself, take a shower, meditate and try to hit the sack again. Early mornings are the worse for me and I know why. I just need to harness that demon and then I will be able to sleep. It's a long drawn out process, but I will prevail and so will you.

Comment by Bree N. on February 10, 2014 at 12:31pm

Thanks for the suggestions. During all that activity time I also did Had Kwan Do & Jeet Kune Do, boxing too. All of them served to add to my sense of hyper alertness. Made my body quick and strong for mid 40s. But ever since the 2 major abdominal surgeries, all the PT, a bad relationship ending quickly with stalking, harrassing, threats against not just myself but family too. I think it served to take the anxiety from 2-3 to a level of 25+. I refused the sleep meds for a long time but this past year gave in I know I can't do any of this alone. Meditation has always been a part of my life, but this past year Tai Chi has been suggested several times. That and yoga ...perhaps I should pay attention to those suggestions!!


USFRA Staff
Comment by Capt. D Lewis on February 10, 2014 at 1:39am

I wish I could give you a period of time to look forward to but I can't. I'm still experiencing sleepless nights myself. I'm on guard all the time listening for footsteps, foreign whispers, grenade launchers, the unexpected boom of IEDs and the like. I refuse to take the meds because I don't want to rely on them for shut eye. My body wants the sleep, but my mind just won't shut up! I've started meditating and using Tai Chi. It has helped a lot. You will have to find something that relax and calm your body and mind. Try a lot of different things. Just don't give up.

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